Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Well, it's better then killing kittens

Bundling...the old New England custom of pre-marital non-sex. Well, almost non-sex since she did occassionally become pregnant.

"In 1776, a clergyman from one of the polite towns, went into the country, and reached against the unchristian custom of young men and maidens lying together on a bed. He was no sooner out of the church, than attacked by a shoal of good old women, with, 'Sir, do you think we and our daughters are naughty, because we allow of bundling?' 'You lead yourselves into temptation by it.' They all replied at once, 'Sir, have you been told thus, or has experience taught it you?' The Levite began to lift up his eyes, and to consider of his situation, and bowing, said, 'I have been told so.' The ladies, una voce, bawled out, 'Your informants, sir, we conclude, are those city ladies who prefer a sofa to a bed; we advise you to alter your sermon, by substituting the word sofa for bundling, and on your return home preach it to them, for experience has told us that city folks send more children into the country without fathers or mothers to own them, than are born among us; therefore, you see, a sofa is more dangerous than a bed.' The poor priest, seemingly convinced of his blunder, exclaimed, 'Nec vitia nostra, nee remedia pati possumus,' hoping thereby to get rid of his guests; but an old matron pulled off her spectacles, and, looking the priest in the face like a Roman heroine, said, 'Noli putare me haec auribus tuis dare! Others cried out to the priest to explain his Latin. 'The English,' said he, 'is this: Who is me that I sojourn in Meseck, and dwell in the tents of Kedar!' One pertly retorted, 'Gladii decussati sunt gemina presbyteri clavis.' The priest confessed his error, begged pardon, and promised never more to preach against bundling, or to think amiss of the custom; the ladies generously forgave him, and went away.

More about the Art of Bundling.

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